blog:2023:0307_trauma
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blog:2023:0307_trauma [03/08/2023 02:53] – [Trauma] Alisssandra | blog:2023:0307_trauma [03/11/2023 07:34] – [Trauma] Alisssandra | ||
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- | I hate how people write me off as stuck up, snobby, and above others. No one stops to think about what may have given cause or effect into a person' | + | I hate how people write me off as stuck up, snobby, and above others. No one stops to think about what may have given cause or effect into a person' |
- | I'm so quiet when I do speak what I say is unexpected | + | I'm so quiet when I do speak what I say is unexpected, completely out of left field, but relevant. Sounds right for a left handed individual. |
I was beaten as a toddler, child, adolescence severed me drastically. As a result I'm disconnected from people. Suffering issues of trust, I trust few, and keep people at arms length. | I was beaten as a toddler, child, adolescence severed me drastically. As a result I'm disconnected from people. Suffering issues of trust, I trust few, and keep people at arms length. | ||
+ | Hence my side job over phone. Sexual abuse caused issues with intimacy. My attitude....we' | ||
- | Hence my sideline job over phone. Sexual abuse caused issues with intimacy. My attitude....we've had sex, now what? The given feeling is fleeing. Fucking is one thing..what happens later is another. | + | Fear causes panic....set different from others I'm on high alert. |
- | Fear causes my panic....set different from others I'm on high alert. What people presume about me is quite funny. | + | I am highly abused, traumatized, |
- | + | ||
- | People don't realize | + | |
I'm slowly beginning to open about what I experienced as a whole. Terrible enough my daughter says, I'm lieing bc I act to normal to have been abused. My response, "how are abused people supposed to act?" | I'm slowly beginning to open about what I experienced as a whole. Terrible enough my daughter says, I'm lieing bc I act to normal to have been abused. My response, "how are abused people supposed to act?" | ||
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Last thing I want people noticing about me is abuse. I have issues to resolve before trying to be with anyone else. | Last thing I want people noticing about me is abuse. I have issues to resolve before trying to be with anyone else. | ||
- | Classic line, " | + | Classic line, " |
Since beginning portion of journal.. Fuck ailment: headaches, constipation, | Since beginning portion of journal.. Fuck ailment: headaches, constipation, | ||
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Allegedly I killed people in fairness they stopped my heart using cardiac arrest. u killed me first by putting me in zero gravity. Giving me full access to power source. | Allegedly I killed people in fairness they stopped my heart using cardiac arrest. u killed me first by putting me in zero gravity. Giving me full access to power source. | ||
- | Yeah, killed | + | Yeah, kill me, expect me to Stargate, and I refuse |
+ | |||
+ | Fuck yeah, allegedly I fried everything and everyone in fucking sterile white room. Then have nerve to call Me a Murderer. | ||
+ | |||
+ | I didn't need defibrillator, | ||
- | Fuck yeah, I allegedly fried everything and everyone in fucking sterile white room. Then nerve to call Me a Murderer. | + | I'd say I was 8 or 9 having such a nightmare. |
blog/2023/0307_trauma.txt · Last modified: 03/11/2023 07:36 by Alisssandra