Had fucked up dream. dreamt I killed 2 children hadlee and hudson in a motel. My husband's alleged children. Picked them up one day…and when we entered into room hudson went first head in head board crushed skull immediately made sure he didn't feel much pain. Not so much as a scream…next went hadlee….drew water and played a game of how long hadlee holds breath under water. Under hot scalding water…lotsa screaming randy…mommy walks in and in absolute shock…all I needed to say, “do u think I need ur forgiveness?”